In these dark days as Israel sets out to destroy Gaza and its poor unfortunate Palestinian people some light relief is needed. ( I hope I won’t get arrested for that particularly accurate piece of free speech) Along comes Bruno, a loveable French eccentric cycling around Europe, indeed the world given a chance.
I don’t know Bruno but am about to come face to face with his formidable Gallic presence.
A mysterious morning phonecall from Mike says he has a roving cyclist in his drive whom I might be interested in meeting, come around. Could be one of my passing acquaintances I think and off I go. There in the drive is this man and his touring bike with attached trailer, quite a common site on the lanes of Britain. I have met many an interesting European on the roads and have been amazed at their tenacity, endurance and sociability. I suppose I did it once.
The story so far – he is cycling along Lancashire’s quiet country lanes when, probably from the hawthorn hedge cutters, one of the wheels on his trailer deflates. It is surprising how quickly that slows you down. He pulls into my friend’s drive and asks for a bucket of water to diagnose the source of his puncture. Their combined efforts haven’t sorted out the problem, repair plasters haven’t stopped the leakage. 
There is still a leak from the side of the repair. Despite this Bruno is happy to talk at length about his exploits and the many previous and future destinations on his travels. He is keen to show us extracts from radio and TV appearances in Europe and other countries. His broken English and our wrecked French leads to some amusing conversation. When I took out my phone for a photo of the ever increasingly comic situation he demanded a video of his proposed next visit to the USA for YouTube. From what we can gather he had crossed America coast to coast on a couple of occasions. He has been on the road for 14 years – sleeping in barns if possible – hard to believe. He had a map in one of the many pockets on the bike to show us his travels. By now most of his worldly belongings are spread out on the drive but no progress is made on the puncture. 
Mike goes off to phone Halford’s to see if they have this small size 22 inch tube in stock. He is met with directions to their website for what’s in stock – no luck there. I would have happily driven Bruno and his tube down there for a replacement.
Having reinstated the tube into the tyre with difficulty it still deflates, as expected. I tried. Meanwhile, Bruno, to reinforce his experience as a global adventurer, shows us all the food he carries as well as his Stetson hat ready for his USA visit. Gregarious to a fault.
Plan B. Another friend and his wife live around the corner, they are keen cyclists and work from home so should be in. I feel I can ask their help – that’s what friends are for. “This is Bruno” holding his inner tube, I explain “he is going around the world but has a puncture.” Jonathon blinks but rises to the challenge and takes us into his garage, aka bike shed. Michelle appears and after a chorus or two of ‘Michelle my Belle’ we get down to business. Jonathon dares rip the old patch from the inner tube. A feat I had resisted In case I accidentally inflicted Bruno onto Mike’s hospitality for the night. Michelle appears with a coffee, “pas de lait, mais six sucre s’il vous plaît“. As a perfect hostess there are three shortbreads and two mini chocolate Swiss rolls on the tray. As Jonathon and I discuss the best way to repair the puncture the shortbreads are dunked and quickly eaten. I didn’t have the French for ‘dunked’ but I think he understood as the Swiss rolls disappeared into one of his many pockets.
Back to Mike’s, who has wisely had a sandwich in our absence. In the drive is the shipwrecked bike trailer. Renewed energy and determination with some brute force saw the inner tube back into the tyre and back onto the trailer. J’espere c’est bon. 
It takes some time before Bruno packs up all his possessions in what to me appear flimsy polythene bags. 
Much later we see him off on the quieter way and perhaps with some relief onwards to Scotland, but I fear for his health as the temperatures drop. Bon courage. 
Let me know if you come across him. You can find him on YouTube.
We have been into poetry recently and Eunice, a fellow blogger, has come up with this lovely effort. Thanks.
BC got a phone call from Mike
Who said “There’s this guy with a bike
In my drive, with a puncture
And just at this juncture
He’s in quite a bit of a stew”
So BC drove himself round to Mike’s
To offer some help with the bike
But the patched up repair
Was still leaking air
And the language was turning quite blue.
A phone call to Halford’s ensued
But they couldn’t supply the right tube
So BC rang a friend
In the hope he could mend
The puncture, which they couldn’t do.
With coffee and cakes from Michelle
And a bit of a sing-song as well
A solution was made
On the best way to aid
Poor Bruno, without more ado.
The tube was put back on the bike
With some brute force from BC and Mike,
Then back on the road
Went Bruno with load
And they waved him off into the blue.
Eunice.
***
And in honour of Michelle, my friends, Bruno, France and the day in general.
A brilliant encounter and, as you say, so uplifting. What a guy! Hopefully Bruno’s tyre holds out. But Scotland in Autumn and Winter? I’m guessing he’s seen worse in 14 years on the road.
He relies on farmers allowing him to use a barn, but that is becoming more difficult as time goes on and buildings converted. In some ways he is more of a tramp than a cyclist and people are suspicious of him. Just glad we could be of some help..
Eccentric doesn’t quite cover it.
I wonder what such folk do for money? I agree with you, those flimsy poly bags look like a disaster waiting to happen, but if he’s survived for 14 years it must work for him. At my age the sudden drop in temperature over the last few days makes a trip to my garage feel like Scott trying to get to that last depot – I don’t envy Bruno at all, but as you say, “when we were younger…
There was a lot about his life that appeared ‘sketchy’ but that was probably due to his broken English and his habit of repeating himself. He has survived so far.
A great story which made me smile. I hope Bruno’s adventures continue and he stays safe during the winter months.
I worry about him in the winter, let’s hope he finds shelter at night.
Hi ,he survived ok 😀 I spoke to him yesterday in Exeter. He has a problem with his brakes and unfortunately we were unable to get the parts he needs
Thanks for that. Good to catch up with him. Where is heading next?
Following my previous comment on poetry I thought you might like this –
BC got a phone call from Mike
Who said “There’s this guy with a bike
In my drive, with a puncture
And just at this juncture
He’s in quite a bit of a stew”
So BC drove himself round to Mike’s
To offer some help with the bike
But the patched up repair
Was still leaking air
And the language was turning quite blue.
A phone call to Halford’s ensued
But they couldn’t supply the right tube
So BC rang a friend
In the hope he could mend
The puncture, which they couldn’t do.
With coffee and cakes from Michelle
And a bit of a sing-song as well
A solution was made
On the best way to aid
Poor Bruno, without more ado.
The tube was put back on the bike
With some brute force from BC and Mike,
Then back on the road
Went Bruno with load
And they waved him off into the blue.
Brilliant. Thanks. I may take it out of comments and add it as an addendum to my post. With your permission and due credit of course.
Oh, and the 4th line of the penultimate verse should be ‘was’ not ‘as’ – the letters are wearing off my keyboard! 🙂
Got it.
Of course BC, feel free to do whatever you want with it : )
Ta.
Pingback: ANOTHER SURPRISE. | bowlandclimber
Quite a character – the cyclist too 😉
What an encounter. I wonder where he is now?
I met him in Exeter City Centre yesterday afternoon. His bike had fallen over and he was wrestling to get it upright. I helped him and we realised the wheel was a bit buckled. He was saying DISASTER DISASTER OOOH LA LA FOCK! Despite the wheel, he was jovial, but was keen to get out of the busy area. He told me he uses a slingshot to keep crazy people away. I talked him through bike repair shops and which one is the best bet for help that might be free. Remarkable and memorable, good luck Bruno.
Hope someone helped him out with the wheel.
Excellent, BC, I’ve enjoyed catching up with your entries, and this one in particular. Good to see your estate car looking smart, and your wise decision to steer clear of main roads.
All best wishes
Martin
Onwards and upwards.
Bruno is in our shed in North Queensferry! Very similar situation. Turned up at our neighbours with a puncture! Another neighbour got him a new tube from Halfords… he is well as far as we can tell. Despite the hideous weather.
I have worried about his condition in the winter weather up in Scotland. He is very vulnerable I think. God bless you for giving him shelter.
How did you find me?
Send my regards from Longridge. I wonder how and where he has been since leaving Lancashire.
Maybe he will call in on the way back south.
Hi
We met Bruno yesterday in Taunton, Somerset! He was sleeping in the church porch near our house. He had a puncture again bless him. We made him coffee (4 sugars this time) and some breakfast. What an interesting man.
Came across your blog doing a search for him so just thought I would let you know where he was.
Alison
Good news. If you can show him my video of his Lancashire episode.
Thank you Alison.
Earlier on this afternoon Birthday Boy Martin Williams spotted a charming French Man Bruno on his drive in Farringdon near Exeter Airport. There was a problem with the trailer tyre. Beverley came to the rescue with coffee and FOURspoons of sugar while Martin and Anthony solved the problem with a stirrup pump. He went on his way towards Plymouth. A remarkable 71 year old man!
Amazing guy. He must have lots of mishaps though. Thanks for the information. Wonder where he will turn up next?
Stopped on our driveway in north Wiltshire today – exhausted and hungry. Cup of coffee (very specifically, four and a *half* sugars) and a cheese sandwich sent him on his way. Just found this story about him, amazing!
The story continues. He possibly needs more help than the obvious.
It is heartening that there are people like you to see him on his way.
Thanks for the update.
A blogger’s gift waiting to be exploited – you grabbed it with gusto and took full advantage. Brilliant post.
Have you just found it?
Yesterday was good, thanks for calling.
I see there is a ‘competitive’ Boots and Brews posting from Mark.
My husband and I are visiting in Heacham in north Norfolk. We saw Bruno sitting on a sofa inside St Mary’s Church. His bike, trailer, sleeping bag and possession all inside the church with him. A kind gentleman was trying to help him by taking to the council department for emergency housing.
It is bitterly cold now and he clearly can’t continue this nomadic lifestyle. I hope he can rest and recover some strength. Maybe he needs an alternative plan for the colder months.
He is a survivor, but in these onditions needs shelter like many homeless people.
Bumped into this happy on the B3157 coming out of Weymouth. I passed him in the car half way up a very steep hill, pushing his bike and trailer. It looked like he was struggling so I stopped in a lay-by and walked down to offer assistance. A chap on a moped Will, also stopped so between us we pushed the bike to the top. He was headed to Bridport. I would have given him a lift but he could not split the bike and trailer apart so it would not fit in my car. When I drove past him having walked back for my car, he was just getting back on the saddle on a flatter part of the route. Safe trip Bruno.
Thanks for that update, David.
It’s good to hear he keeps popping up. He’s an entertaining eccentric living a hard life. I wonder if he ever goes back to France. There are more questions than answers.
Well, guess what, I decided to go out and look for Bruno this morning.
This is a short video that shows this unusual old man that has cycled around the UK for many years. He is French and his English is not that good, he also seems to talk nonsense at times.
I first saw him on the 26th May coming out of Weymouth towards Bridport, I passed him half way up a very steep hill. He was struggling to push his bike and trailer up it. I stopped further up the hill and walked back down to offer assistance. Another young chap on a moped also stopped and between myself and Will we pushed the bike to the top, I can tell you it took the two of us.
From there it was generally flat, or downhill to Bridport, maybe a short incline section but nowhere near what he had just experienced. His plan was to sleep in the church.
Anyway, today the 27th May, I felt that I needed to go out and buy Bruno breakfast. I looked in St Mary’s Church and could not see him so I went on my own cycle ride. 2 hrs later as I headed back, he passed me on the opposite side of the road, I turned around, caught up with him and took him to the cafe at Morrison’s to buy him breakfast, he had a large full English and a Cappuccino with about 6 sugar sachet’s.
Whilst in there we bumped into a couple, Andy and Delphine whom were travelling from Portsmouth to Bude in their camper van. Delphine was French and spent time speaking to Bruno in his native language, although she did say that he did not make sense at times.
He seems to have no passport or travel documents, but wishes somehow to get a boat to America. Not sure that will happen and I think he will even struggle to get back into France! If he so wished without paperwork.
I then offered to buy him a meal deal for later and he had two of them! Why not.
He wanted me to take a video of him and upload it to YouTube in the same way that others have done. I have obliged and I am sharing what I know of his storey in the same way that others have. If you come accross Bruno on your travels please help him out. His next destination is the direction of Cornwall. With no map, no phone, probably no money, sleeping where he can, only speaking broken English, a very heavy bike set up, let’s hope he makes it. He is a very resilient man.
Also look him up on YouTube, others have posted video’s.
Good luck Bruno on your travels.
Thanks you to Will for helping push yesterday and Andy and Delphine for your time today.
https://youtu.be/yHPn_j4fSrE?si=-jqu9_P_e9CQh0Tv
Interesting video, thanks.
I don’t know how he keeps going.
A Bruno update for anyone wondering: He made it to Cornwall, and spent last night just outside Penryn, sleeping on a flatbed trailer in the field opposite our house. Rang the doorbell this morning asking for a coffee. Couldn’t make head nor tail of his sugar requirements, so furnished him with a handful of sachets. Reading the comments here, in retrospect I think it was 3 1/2 spoons. No sign of any bike. As far as I could make out his plan is to head for California to pan for gold because France and England are “finished”. Some mention of the Atlantic and a parachute?! which my French and his English between us couldn’t quite straighten out. Anyway, he had his breakfast sitting on our wall, and then went on his way. Definitely a character, and seems happy enough in his world.